Feelings

Picasso's The Old Guitarist 

“Feelings! Whoa-oa-oa, feelings! Whoa-oa-oa, feel you again in my arms!”

If you were around in the 1970s you remember that song by Morris Albert. You are also cringing, knowing you will have that song stuck in your head for at least the next hour or two.

The truth is, I never think about intense feelings without that song sneaking into my thoughts. It always starts with the first line: “Feelings, nothing more than feelings.”

“Nothing more than feelings.” And that’s what they usually are . . . nothing more than feelings. But what incredible power they may hold in our lives—if we allow them and give them that much control over our lives.

Morris Albert is bemoaning the rampant feelings that are tearing his heart out in his song, but are feelings necessarily a bad thing? Of course not! Feelings are what bring us joy, happiness, satisfaction, affection, elation, and so many other wonderful emotions as we experience the highs of life.

Feelings also perform a critical function of warning us when we are entering a dangerous situation or need to do something important. Have you ever experienced that feeling that something is wrong in a relationship or a job or a place so you knew to get out just in time? Have you ever had a feeling that someone in your life needed you or that you needed to go ahead with a project and you found out later that you were right on target? Those feelings are immensely important in life.

On the other hand, some of our feelings can get us off track in life: feelings that we aren’t appreciated enough; feelings that our friends aren’t really liking us for ourselves or making our friendship a priority; feelings that our spouses or partners don’t love us as much as they should; feelings that we are being overlooked by everybody. In each of these feelings, we are quantifying responses from others and allowing that to form and shape our “feeling” responses.

Sometimes we can’t help how we feel . . . nor should we. We should accept and acknowledge that these are our feelings. But we should choose which feelings we act upon and what path of action we follow.

We need to remember that they are feelings . . . “nothing more than feelings.”

I love watching little kids play. Kids who are around four or five. They have a knack for forming little tribes as they set up their own games and rules of play. As they get started, inevitably one of the children will step up as leader and begin telling all the others what their roles will be and what they will be doing. And just as inevitably, one of their subjects will, at some point, become disgruntled at a given direction and holler back, “You’re not the boss of me!”

Don’t allow your feelings to determine your mode of behavior. Sometimes feelings can be wonderful and satisfying, but sometimes they lie and can shut you down. When a feeling says, “They don’t love you or they’d show it more,” or, “She’s not your friend or she’d be calling you to go out to lunch at least once a month,” or anything that tempts you to walk away from the people in your life or groups that are probably good connections, look your feelings in the eye and say, “You’re nothing more than a feeling . . . and YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!”

And then, for heaven’s sake, play a happier song.

“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
    How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
    How long will my enemy triumph over me? . . .

But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.” 

(Psalm 13:1-2, 5-6, emphasis added)

I'll Take Door #3

Years ago when I was teaching school, I was sitting around with some fellow schoolteachers trading stories about our classroom experiences. One of my friends taught kindergarten and told of a first-day incident with a very precocious kid. They had just returned from lunch and as soon as they walked back into the classroom, this little boy walked over to the center rug and lay down on a comfortable spot. My friend walked over and knelt down beside him, quietly whispering to him, “Honey, what are you doing?”

Without moving a muscle, the boy responded, “It’s naptime. I’m going to sleep.” My friend suppressed a laugh, and then said, “Sweetie, you’re in school now. We don’t have naptime.” The boy’s eyes opened as he looked at her in disbelief. She said, “Really. So go ahead and go back to your seat."

Reluctantly, the boy sat up. After a few moments of reflection, he slowly stood up. As he walked away, my friend could hear the child muttering, “Well, I sure didn’t sign up for this.”

And don’t we all know that feeling?

I’ve had times in my life that I’ve wished I was a contestant on Let’s Make a Deal, bartering with Monty Hall, Drew Carey, or Wayne Brady. I’ve wished he would say, “So, Lynn, do you want to keep your current life, or do you want to trade it for what we have behind Door #3?” And I’ve known I would pitch it all in for Door #3 in a second! To walk away with a pool table and a hanging lamp would be such an improvement!

All week, our Tennessee roads have been icy and our yards have been blanketed in snow. Our children have been out of school an entire week! In Tennessee! This is the South, for heaven’s sake! And it would be charming if we were hearing “It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas…” on our radios, but it’s approaching the end of February and we’re getting tired of this. We did not sign up for this!

But this is such a relatively small thing. Life can hand out much more complicated obstacles that we certainly didn’t sign up for…illness, job loss, financial stress, rebellious kids, and so many other things that don’t feel like something we signed up for.

So what do we do? We’re in awful places in our lives and our options don’t include anything nearly attractive as a new pool table.

Some people begin making truly stupid choices, looking for ways to make the frustration and the inner stress go away. I won’t even begin to list here all of the bad choices a person might make when life becomes complicated…I don’t have to. We see them all around us. Some of us have made those bad choices. And some of us know that those choices just lead to further complications in life.

Our best choice when life gets hard…our only real choice…is the same choice when life is simple: Follow Jesus. We should follow him in the easy times of life; we should follow him in the difficult times of life.

Why? Because Jesus is the Light. He will always show us the way.

“When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, ‘I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life’” (John 8:12).

Sign up for that.

Across the Generations

Music runs through my veins. Anyone who knows me knows that.

Give me a topic and I can name three songs with that in their title or lyrics. Give me a line from a song (especially if it's from the '60s, '70s, or '80s) and I can name that tune. I can sing along with any song from those decades...especially in the car where no one else can hear me and correct the lyrics that may or may not be right but have worked for me all these years.

Music has a special place in my heart and soul and always has since I was just a toddler. I grew up on it.

Music evolves and expands. Some genres evolve more quickly and some forms of music seem to spring up out of nowhere and then stick around, gradually influencing other genres of music. Generation to generation, we all find our own voice and our own form of expression, we music lovers and music makers.

One thing that never changes is the word of God. Oh, we have various translations now. We go back and find a better way to interpret the original text for today's language. And we discover better ways to understand how to place the original writings in their historical context. But the message never changes.

The very best part of the Scripture that never changes are the words of Jesus. They always ring true and always reach straight through to our hearts, no matter our age, no matter the decade in which we live. Why is that?

Jesus spoke to all people. His message was for everyone, regardless of culture, social status, sex, age, race, ability, or anything else society would use to define us. And it was for all time...as we know it. He spoke in stories that everyone could understand. He spoke of love, grace, and redemption. He knew his message would bring controversy and division and he addressed that too. But he promised a Comforter, and we can all receive that message.

Musical preferences separate people by age, geography, culture, and other demographics. The word of God unites us as we read words that say, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life" (John 3:16). Words of love, hope, and grace will always bring us together.

Actually, I can think of one song that is timeless and seems to reach everyone in our country:

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found; was blind, but now I see.

Share the Love...and Drive out Fear

Do not be afraid.

Repeatedly throughout the Bible, messages delivered from God begin with those words: Do not be afraid. Look at Psalm 27:1-3; Matthew 14:27 and 17:7; and Acts 18;9.

When we are followers of Jesus Christ, there is nothing for us to fear. Sometimes the greatest way to show our love is to remind other believers of that truth. When someone we know is afraid of the future, afraid of the unknown, afraid of a medical diagnosis, afraid of the economic outlook, afraid of death, we can remind them that the God who loves us is the One who created the universe and has all of it in his hands. He is all-knowing, all-seeing, and all-powerful.

This is not to be confused with all-causing. Terrible things happen that are outside his perfect will. Into this perfect universe, he introduced the element of choice. With that ability to choose came sin, rebellion against God's perfect will. As a result, bad things happen in this world and the consequences of those bad things grieve the heart of God as they do ours. But none of those consequences are beyond the power of God to save and redeem.

Paul said it best in his letter to the Romans:

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
     "For your sake we face death all day long;
     we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:35-39)

This is the bottom line: We have nothing to fear when we trust in Christ. We should take the time and make the effort to communicate to other Christians that fear--anything that suggests that something could bypass the power of God in and over our lives--is a lie.

Furthermore, we should recognize that trouble, hardship, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, and sword have no part in the love of Christ. That may sound like I am stating the obvious, but too often we allow people to believe they are facing these things at the hand of God. Paul is clearly stating that these things may be trying to separate us from the hand of God, but they cannot. No one, especially a fellow believer, should allow someone to believe that they are suffering these trials as a part of God's will.

We will face terrible things in this world. But the good news--the astounding news--is that "we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." Nothing--absolutely nothing--can separate us from the love and ultimate will of God in our lives.

Do not be afraid.